Can Gays Really All Get Along?

You're The Most Colorful Thing That I've Seen
You’re The Most Colorful Thing That I’ve Seen (Photo credit: Dia™)


I come across headers, every now and then, that sound like a plea for all Gays to Get Along.  The header then gives you just enough to tease you with the direction of the article.   What’s so unfortunate is that you can always tell the type of author who wrote the piece.   Usually, there is never a story trying to unite people of color with other races.  What begins as mainstream ultimately must remain mainstream.


Gossip and fashion are two of the main issues that drive gay unity.  Perez Hilton knows full well the importance of cattiness and the thrill to impress via dress.  For the gay man, at least, appearance is everything along with strong finances.  Otherwise, why exist?  Then again, if you don’t really have it, give the impression that you do.  Everything is about managing the perception of perfection.  In today’s vision, starting a family with a partner is key to success.  By comparison, gays tend to stick with members of their likes.  Now don’t get me wrong, this is typical of heterosexual relationships too.  But gay men and women can take family life to more extreme level of exuberance of showmanship.  By that, I mean flamboyance.  Being gay, for so many of my friends, is another or the best way for them to be extroverted.  Social mobility and that being a social butterfly are aspects that help gays prosper and mature.  This is the mainstream.


How do gays of color fit into the scheme of mainstream gay life?  They don’t appear to be included in the usual talk that relates other gays.  Whether it is all about the color of their skin or the preconceived notion that no matter what they call themselves, the thought of being violent reigns supreme.  In other words, militant would be a better expression of a person of color who goes against authority.  And by authority, it is intended to mean white.  Although it may be more threatening to see two men of color together as a couple or in a family setting with one or more children (as they are more heavily judged in adoption cases), it is less threatening when one member is of a more acceptable race.  Even then, there is the question of whether true love exists in the relationship.


 So, can everybody get along?  The only way I see it, the ones in charge are the ones who need to let their guard down.  Look at what Augusta National just did – not only did they allow women into their prestigious all-male club, they allowed a woman of color.  Granted, Condi isn’t really a woman of color.  She has stature, clout, respect.  Not all women of color have the honor in mainstream America.  But what would really help a male of color…would it help if he achieved stature before he announced the church he was a member of?  Probably not.  That is unless he had the support of an accepted one.  Then, I guess, some acceptance is better than no acceptance at all, right?     

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