Tyra Banks will NEVER die!



Tyra Banks at the 2000 Cannes Film Festival.
Tyra Banks at the 2000 Cannes Film Festival. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


Tyra Banks will NEVER Die!  Okay, that’s a given.  But you just can’t call her a “Green-Eyed Monster” just for the sake of calling her that.  Tyra Banks is a force to be reckoned with. 




Modeling since the young age of 15, Tyra, with her mother beside her every step of the way, has diligently worked to become a Supermodel, Actress, Author, Television Show Host, and most recently a Harvard Business School graduate.  Okay.  I made the word ‘graduate’ in lower case all because it has been reported that Tyra didn’t exactly graduate from Harvard Business School (four-year program).  She participated and completed a weekend entrepreneurial course and received a certificate for her effort.  At least she did grace the halls of Harvard College.  Many of us will never get the chance to say that we had the privilege.  But that’s not the reason Tyra Banks will never die.  Tyra Banks will NEVER die because she is a chameleon.  A soul that can change its look more times than it can change its mind is a wonderfully beneficial thing.  With the soul being a thing, we cannot look at Tyra Banks as just a 5 foot 10 inch beauty who dates and eats what she wants at will.  We must view Tyra Banks as a fierce media mogul competitor who is as savvy as she is passionate.  If the Media ever caught Tyra Banks crying over a lost relationship, may the earth part and swallow up every person who kicked and scratched their way to that historic photo.  May Tyra Banks expose her true self in a Medussa-like pose before revealing who she chose to keep safe from destruction in a photo she always carries around with her.




At 39 years of age, Tyra Lynne Banks (it’s a mystery why she won’t use that middle name more often) is already worth more than $45 million.  Establishing her “America’s Next Top Model” show, Tyra Banks became not just an innovator, but a trendsetter.  Her show has sparked many copycats as the show’s title itself (with the exception of the country it is shown in) is seen in more than 25 countries.  While Tyra Banks can be seen week after week crushing and dashing a young girl’s hopes and dreams of becoming America’s Next Top Model, she herself can be seen off-screen making the Social 50 by wearing raccoon-eyed makeup or up-stepping her real, voluptuous breasticles so high until we think she is the one who put the ‘hoo’ in hoochie.  Tyra Banks will NEVER die because she has been and probably will be the only African-American (someday they’ll go back to using the word “Black”) woman to continue exposing the glamorous Modeling business for its unattractiveness.  How can someone ever die who gets mocked for a saying a phrase or a word that many think they are but only a true few really are?  Tyra Banks will NEVER die because she can back-up what she puts-up.




Tyra Banks may have changed her format for this new cycle of “America’s Next Top Model” for the better this time.  Prior to Cycle 19, the judges selected the winners and losers of the show.  For this season, at least half of the pressure is taken off of Tyra Banks and her panel of judges by the public voting on photos of the show’s contestants.  How creative!  André Leon Talley should have never judged the girls on that show in the first place.  Who would ever agree that his own fashions were fashionable?  This is just another reason why Tyra Banks will NEVER die.  She rejected VOGUE!  When Tyra Banks’ nemesis, Janice Dickinson, tried to start her own failed modeling show, she made men her main focus while putting women on the back burner.  Maybe Tyra Banks can start a show like that but using men only.  You know.  She could start an “America’s Next Top Male Model.”  Another winner, Tyra Banks!  But this time, no males get to judge the men…at all.  I don’t even know why she’s got a male judge on her show now.  Anyway, Tyra Banks will NEVER die because her looks are the hats she wears.  What surprises Tyra Banks?  Insincerity surprises Tyra Banks.  Tyra Banks knows how to make anyone feel sorry for feeling ungrateful for the opportunity to be in her presence.  Just the honor of standing beside another girl about to learn your fate on the show is enough to pee your pants and fall out while having an epileptic seizure.  As the tears flow, the slob will grow.  How more household must she be?




While many models, let alone Supermodels, are considered brainless, Tyra Banks is quite the public speaker.  Having won two Daytime Emmy Awards for her talk show, Tyra Banks has proven that she is a fierce force in the educating of young girls.  And when you get a congratulatory phone call from the Oprah, why not believe you have truly arrived?  With quite a colorful and diverse resume that includes singer/songwriter, Tyra Banks will NEVER die!  Though not even the extremely wealthy, but waif-like, Gisele Bundchen has tried her hand at talk-show host, Tyra Banks would escalate her standing in society by becoming just a mother.  She wouldn’t even need to marry – just have a baby.  Well, what kind of message would that send to young girls?  A great one!  Look girls, I’m rich, I’m famous, and I’m a single-mom!  Not just a talk-show surrogate mom, but a real, honest-to-goodness mother!  But still, Tyra Banks will NEVER die!  When most women of color turn to the OWN Network for assistance, like the first-ever self-professed Supermodel, Beverly Johnson, Tyra Banks took her own lead and won.  And, as long as her mother is alive and by her side, Tyra Banks will NEVER die!


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